Dear Ms. A*****,
Thank you for not killing my grandparents while you were driving recklessly on the freeway today. My family spent all of Thanksgiving at the hospital while my grandparents endured round after round of tests, which were quite unpleasant, especially ...since my grandmother just had a round of chemo YESTERDAY.We got home from the hospital around 8pm, where everyone was too shook up to eat. So thank you for saving us from ingesting unnecessary calories.
Also, thank you for providing us with such a craptastic holiday that every Thanksgiving in the future will be fantastic by comparison.
But mostly, I'm just grateful that you did not kill my grandparents today while you chose to drive drunk.
I hope you had a great holiday, which I'm assuming you did, since you were laughing hysterically on your cellphone while my Grandpa was filling out the police report this afternoon at the accident scene. While you laughed and carried on with your giddy cell phone conversation, my Grandma was doubled over in the fetal position in pain because the right side of her face slammed against the inside of the car when you hit them. In case you didn't know, she had major reconstructive surgery on the right side of her face because a specialist at UCLA had to remove cancer from her sinus cavity.
But again, thank you for not killing my grandparents. Also, thank you for having car insurance.
PS: I hope you continue to provide such a wonderful example to your students, seeing as how you teach high school social studies and many of your students probably look up to you as a role model.
PPS: I usually don't take cheap shots, but I think it was very sad that your car was completely decked out in Disney decals and other such Disney paraphernalia, especially since you were drunk driving. You are a 40 year old woman and your car looks like a 5th grade girl's notebook.